The Last Tradition has obtained a transcript of a top secret meeting between President Obama, Chris Matthews and Al Sharpton on how to handle Texas Gov Rick Perry entrance to the GOP run for president.
President Obama: God damn it, Chris! You told me Perry wasn’t going to run.
Chris Matthews: I tried to tell you Mr. President. But, you don’t answer your cell while you’re playing golf.
President Obama: Oh, so you think I play too much golf too?
Matthews: I didn’t say that Mr. President. My, that’s a very sharp crease you have in your pants, Mr. President.
Obama: What are you David Brooks now? Let’s focus Chris. What are we gonna do about Perry. This guy can kick my ass!
Al Sharpton: Mr. President?
Obama: Al? Don’t you see I’m talking to Chris right now?
Sharpton: Yeah, but….
Obama: Shut up, Al. I’ll get to you in a minute. What do we do, Chris?
Matthews: Let’s see, what can we do? Oh, I got it. I’ll call him crazy on my show.
Obama: Crazy huh?
Matthews: That’s it, Mr. President. I’ll call him crazy on my show, and Al can call him a racist on his show.
Obama: Hmm. Crazy and a racist?
Sharpton: But, Mr. Preesident?
Obama: Al? I’m still talking to Chris remember?
Matthews: I think that’s a winner Mr. President.
Obama: That sounds good, Chris. Maybe you can throw in some Confederate flag stuff. That always works on the Negros.
Sharpton: Negros? Mr. President! You’re black.
Obama: That’s for the campaign trail. I’m half white God dam it
Michelle Obama: It’s time for your 5th prayer of the day.
Obama: Oh, that’s right. Where’s my prayer rug?
Mrs. Obama: Where you always leave it, next to the statue of Mao Tse-tung.
Obama: Oh thanks, Honey. Okay that settles it. Chris, you get on MSNBC and call Perry crazy till the cows come home. And Al, call him a racist. That should be simple enough for you to understand because that’s all you do anyway.
Sharpton: Yes, Mr. President
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